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“Get out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.”Brian Tracy
I am a big fan of doing the unusual things. Sometimes in big ways. Often in small and daily ways to mix things up. Why? Because this habit is a simple and relatively easy way to:
Get out of your comfort zone.
And if you change your perspective on yourself from someone who sticks to the old and comfortable all the time to someone who likes to mix things up then it will feel more natural and easier to break out of your comfort zone when comes to bigger things too.
Because this habit makes the inner resistance and the fear that may hold you back smaller.
Add a spark to your day and come alive.
It keeps you from getting stuck in the same old daily or weekly rut. And it adds more fun to your life.
Refuel your curiousness about the world and life.
When you do the unusual thing regularly you to discover a ton of new and exciting things.
And that will refuel your curiousness about what else is out there that you haven’t discovered just yet.
So how do you do the unusual thing and break out of your comfort zone in small and sometimes bigger ways?
20 Ways to Get Out of Your Comfort Zone
Eat the Unusual things. Instead of choosing the meat-based dish at lunch try the vegetarian alternative. Or try the fish if you usually go for the beef.
Smile towards everyone. Instead of just going along with your day in your normal social way try smiling more. Smile more towards your co-workers, the lady at the checkout at the supermarket, the people closest to you and smile to yourself when you encounter a mirror. See what happens.
Cook Something New. Each week we try cooking a new recipe. It is most often a tasty experiment and helps us to find, sometimes unexpected, new favorites. It has also certainly made me a better cook in the last few years.
Mix up your music. I mix things up by trying new music every month. I have a look at the best music on sites like Metacritic. Then I load a few of those albums on Spotify and listen.
Work in complete silence and stillness. Shut the door to your office, shut off your music, unplug the internet and just focus on doing the most important thing you can do today while enjoying the silence.
Read something that your friends wouldn’t guess that you are reading. Doing this has helped me to expand my horizons and learn new skills and many, often unexpected things about the world around me.
Do all your shopping for the week. Instead of doing grocery shopping when you feel like it or need to, sit down and plan what you will eat and need for a whole week. Go and get all of that at the store. Now you don’t have to go back there for a week and you’ll probably have a bunch of extra free time (and less stress) to enjoy this week.
Have a day of kindness. Instead of having the usual bursts of irony, sarcasm etc. during your day try to go for a day where you are just being kind and friendly to everyone including yourself.
Enjoy it all. All fluctuations during your normal day is a part of life and as life it’s a gift in some way or another. So on some days I just tell myself: “enjoy it all”. Then I try to enjoy my day no matter if the inbox is overfull, if I’m hungry and starting to get cranky. The things I usually don’t like so much I tell myself to enjoy as a part of life. And so my day actually becomes more enjoyable because much of how we see life is about how we choose to think about it.
Watch something odd. If you usually watch thrillers then try a romantic comedy. If you most often get stuck with documentaries try an animated movie from Japan (I recommend anything by Hayao Miyazaki). If you love Family Guy, try The Wire. Expand what you watch to get new ideas and impressions.
Listen to the sound of the world. Leave your portable music player/app at home or shut off and in your pocket. Just listen to sounds of the city, nature and people as you move about during your day.
Take a day to be offline. I tend to spend a day a week offline (usually Saturday or Sunday). It’s a wonderful change of pace and feels like I’m on a small, healthy and extra relaxing vacation. Plus, it makes it more fun to get back to work on Monday.
Take a news black out. Instead of reading the paper or watching the news as usual try to go without that for a day. See how it affects you and how much you miss the news.
Hide a note for a loved one. Hide a sweet note of affection for a partner, family member or a friend in his or her cookie jar, tea or coffee container, book on the nightstand, hat, shoes or somewhere else where they look each day. Make him or her happy in an unexpected and unusual way.
Take a different route. To work or to school. To your gym or home. See something new even when you are in transport mode.
Walk or take the bicycle to work. Instead of taking the car or riding the bus as usual. Get some exercise and fresh air before it is time to start working and on your way home.
Let it go just for today. If you often get into arguments or have trouble letting issues go and replay them over and over in your mind then just for today let it all go. Tomorrow you can take up your old habits just where you left them. But for today, instead of getting into an argument just let it go and walk away. If you replay something in your mind, let it go for today. If an old memory pops up today too, let it go instead of dwelling.
Go out. If you usually stay in during the weekdays, then call up a few friends and head down to the pub for a few hours even if it’s just a Wednesday. Or call up someone you haven’t met in ages and go for a cup of tea or coffee. Or pop down to the movie theater and catch a movie. If you usually do those things though, consider just staying in with PJs on and taking it easy.
Sit in a new place. If you have favorite chair or part of the sofa where you always sit then try another chair or place to sit today. It can give you a new perspective at work or at home. And I have found that it can even give me some new and fresh thoughts and perspectives on life.
Throw out the things you haven’t used in 1 year. Go through one part of your home – a closet, a drawer in your desk or bedroom cabinet – and see what’s in there. Go through the items one by one and ask yourself: Have I used this item in the past year? If not, give the item(s) away to charity or a friend or simply throw it out.
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Have you ever had a dream that you want so badly but somehow it never came true?
Have you ever watched people succeed in achieving their dreams while you didn’t?
Yes, we have all been there someday. Some people seem to master the game of life. They just know what they want and they are not afraid to get it.
So why aren’t you doing the same? This book will shed the light on the reason why success seems to work for some people and not for others.
This book is a manual that will take you step by step. This book will teach you how to be successful. It will help you start your journey from dreaming big, setting clear goals and to achieve your dreams.
What is interesting in the book is that each chapter will provide you with an action plan. This is like an exercise that you can practice to learn the secrets of successful people.
So, if success is what you’re after, keep reading this blog to know more about the inner workings of winning the game.
Importance of attitude: Building a positive Attitude
Surely you have wondered why some people, organizations, and companies are more successful than others. The answer is in the Quality.
When we talk about quality, we mean the quality of people and business choices. In the world of success, attitude is what sets the most effective people from the losers.
Every great building starts with a strong foundation. Every successful business starts with TQP. TQP refers to Top Quality People. These are the people that once you add to your team, they’ll have a strong desire to do their best to improve the quality of your business.
Studies have proven that most people get the job because of their attitude not because of their resumes. Having a positive attitude towards your business and life in general is the key of finding your success.
Our attitudes are determined by our environments, education, and experiences. A positive person always cares about others. He is always confident, patience, and resourceful.
To become among the Top Quality People you have to focus on being positive. Practice everyday till it becomes a habit, and keep educating yourself. You also need to avoid negative influences such as negative people and TV programs.
One day a visit from a wise-man changed the life of an African Farmer. Hafiz was happy living and working in his farm. But that all changed by simple words from a wise man.
When he visited Hafiz, the wise man told him that diamonds can make him rich. He told him that if he had a diamond as big as his thumb he can own a city. If the diamond was as big as his fist, he can buy a whole country.
This idea kept Hafiz awake all night long. He wanted to change his present situation, so he decided to sell his farm and went for looking diamonds. He traveled everywhere till he reached Spain. He was now broke, tired, and without any hope of finding the diamonds.
So he killed himself. He jumped off the river and there he was dead.
What Hafiz didn’t know is that back home everything changed. The man who bought his farm found diamonds in his own river. One day the new farmer was enjoying the morning sun and noticed something shinning in the water stream.
When the wise man visited the new owner of the farm, they both realized that Hafiz was sleeping on a diamond mine. Only if he knew.
That proves that positive attitude is everything. If Hafiz stayed positive and believed in his own assets, he would have become the richest of all. Because he approached life with a negative attitude, he was hopeless and lost his own life.
We now know that success is the results of our attitude. Our attitude is a choice, so success is a matter of choice and not luck.
To move ahead in life, we need to seek opportunities and not just be satisfied with what we have. Success is a subjective word. It’s journey of realizing your goals one after the other.
Obstacles don’t matter. Every success story has failure in it’s history. Remember Thomas Edison? He failed almost 10,000 times before he succeeded in creating a light bulb.
To have a mentality of success you need to have a strong desire to succeed, commitment, and responsibility. You must also be willing to work harder than others. Success also comes for those who are patience, caring for others, have a good personality and positive attitude.
You also need to be able to manage your time for the best results and be persistent when facing difficult times. Most people quit when they’re about to achieve their greatest profit yet. Dare to take risks.
Come to the world of business prepared. Believe in the laws of nature and make them work for you. Also never forget to be grateful and to learn from your mistakes.
A young man once asked Socrates about the secrets of success. Socrates told him to meet him in the next day by the river. As they were talking, they got closer to the river.
Socrates grabbed the man by the neck, and pushed him down the river. The man couldn’t breathe. He was struggling to run away from Socrates was stronger than him.
The man struggles and struggles till his face turned blue. Socrates then let him go. As the man caught his breath, Socrates asked him what was the thing he wanted the most when he was under water. The man replied that he wanted “air”.
Socrates told him that only when you want success as much as you wanted air, only then you’ll succeed. A cruel but important lesson is learned here.
If your desire is strong enough, then all you have left is apply the principles of success.
Motivation: Motivating Yourself and Others Everyday
The most important question to ask is not how to do something but why you’re not doing it already. Most people know exactly what they have to do in order to succeed, but they don’t know is why they are not doing these things.
You can be inspired by other people, but you can only be motivated by changing your action plan. Your inner values are the most lasting motivation source in your life. If you believe in some cause, you’ll be motivated to do whatever it takes to achieve it.
You can be motivated by external factors such as fear, money, and incentives. You can also be motivated by internal factors such as pride, sense of achievements, responsibility, and caring for others.
You can motivates others by giving them the recognition and respect they need, helping them, listening to their needs, and challenging them to always do better.
There was a boy who used to play soccer in his school team. The boy was always in reserves because the coach didn’t believe in him.
His father will always come to watch him play, but his son never made it to the team. So the boy stopped coming to practice. But suddenly, he showed up again.
It was the finals. The boy was very determined to play this time. He begged his coach to let him play. The coach refused because the pride of the school was at stake. Everyone was there watching.
After begging and begging, the coach gave up and allowed him to play. The boy surprised everyone, he was on fire. He scored all the goals and he was the star of the game.
When the game was over, the coach asked the boy how he did that. He was always bad at soccer, and suddenly he was a star. The boy told him that his father was watching him this time.
But the father wasn’t there. The coach asked him where his father is. The boy said that his father was blind. Every time he came to practice he wasn’t able to see him play, but today his father could see him for the first time.
The coach asked how. The boy answered that his father was dead. He’s now watching him from above.
You can be the star of your life if you have a strong motivation. Just set clear goals, have high expectations, and move forward in life.
Self-esteem: Building a Positive Self-esteem and Image
You should avoid working with people with low self-esteem. They are not responsible and they never keep their promises. They are also negative and take more than they like to give. Working with someone like this is not good for business.
Some people believe that if they pretend that their self-esteem is high people will believe them. But self-esteem is shown through our actions. It shows through what we like and don’t like. So, there is no need to pretend since your actions will tell the truth anyway.
Where and how you grew up is directly related to your self-esteem. Your environment affects your personality. Your education plays an important role for your self-esteem as well.
Discipline is also important. Growing with a firm belief system will teach you to love yourself and to love responsibility. Discipline doesn’t go against your freedom; it just guides you towards the right path.
The key to success is not in doing what you like, life is not perfect. The key is in liking what we do. We have to be confident to handle whatever comes our way.
To build a positive self-esteem you have to replace your painful memories with positive lessons, ignore your limitations, help others, accept and give compliments, as well as be responsible. If you follow this path, setting goals and achieving them will be easy.
Wilma was young when she had a strong fever that left her paralyzed with polio. She was only four and the doctor told here that she can never put her foot on the floor again.
Wilma had big dreams. She wanted to be the fastest women on the track. The doctor kept telling her no but her mother supported her. Her mother believed that with persistence and good faith, everything is possible.
One day, Wilma took her leg braces off. She walked on her foot the first time after her sickness. She wanted run, so she started competing in the track. She was always the last to arrive to the finish line.
Years went by. Wilma kept on running until finally she won. She went to university and met a good coach. She told the coach about her dream and he believed in her positive spirit.
Wilma went to the Olympics and competed against the fastest women on track. She beat the champion in three races and came home with three gold medals.
Wilma made history for being the first paralytic woman to win the race in 1960 Olympics.
Interpersonal Skills: Building a Pleasing Personality
George Washington once said that what the world needs isn’t product knowledge, but people knowledge. People need to be charismatic and they have to care and connect with others. Building strong connections is important in the world of business.
Life is an echo. Everything you send to the world is reflected back to you. If you send love and positivity, you’ll receive both. Stay away from the aspects that are stopping you from building good relationships with others. Try to avoid being selfish, rude, dishonest, and suspicious of others.
To build a good personality you need to be responsible, considerate of other’s needs, be tactful with your own words, don’t criticize and complain. Try to find excuses for other people’s mistakes, and be a good listener.
It’s also good to be able to admit to our mistakes immediately. This a leader’s attitude. Remember that no one is perfect. Also, don’t engage in worthless arguments. Always try to go for fruitful discussions instead. In order to have a good friend, you need to be a good friend first.
There was a story of two farmers who were exchanging goods with each other. The first one was a baker. He always sends a loaf of bread to the second farmer who sends a pound of butter in return.
One day, the first farmer started thinking. He was not sure that the butter he receives truly weighs one pound, so he brought a scale and he checked. The first farmer was right. The butter he was receiving all this time was less than a pound.
He was angry and he felt betrayed. So, he invited the second farmer to settle at court.
The Judge asked the second farmer about the scale he used to measure the pound of butter.
The second farmer answered that his means were always limited. He doesn’t have a scale so he used the first farmer’s loaf of bread as a scale instead. The amount of butter he sends is just equal to the loaf of bread he receives. So if anyone was cheating in this story, it is the first farmer.
What we can learn from this tale is that anything we do will be reflected exactly back at us. So, send positivity and good attitude, and you’ll receive the best from life.
Subconscious Mind and Habit: Building a Pleasing Personality
We were all born to be successful. We have the inner power to achieve greatness. What hinders our progress is the way we were conditioned by society.
If we watch successful people closely, we notice that they make everything they do look easy. It is not because they are different but it is because they have learned so much to the point where success became a habit for them.
They are now doing it subconsciously. They don’t have room for social norms to affect their nature. They are focused and determined.
You need to start building good habits. These are habits success. To do that, you need to condition yourself for success. By conditioning we mean changing the books you read, the movies you watch, the podcasts you listen to. Make everything in your environment scream success.
Start with your subconscious behavior and your subconscious will automatically follow. The subconscious mind is more powerful because it’s internal. It doesn’t think or question, it just does. That’s the attitude you’re looking for. Fear and hesitation is not your friend. Doing is your best ally if you want to succeed.
Your mind and body may be difficult to control. Changing habits is hard and your mind will be resisting. You need to stay positive and focus on the big picture. Building habit requires discipline and patience.
There is a 12-days formula that teaches us how to form habits. First you need to focus on your self-talk. Change negative comments such as “I’m tired” to positive statement that you practice everyday.
To make these positive statements effective, you need to visualize them daily.
The author tells the story of his nephews. He has two nephews who love playing tennis. Their father was once complaining about how much money this hobby of his children is costing him.
The author asked him why. Compared to them being at home all day, this was a win. They may end up doing other things instead such as bad habits.
The father thought for a while. He then realized that playing tennis is a cheap price for raising good children with positive personalities. He was protecting them from the world and setting them in the right path.
Life is like a vacuum. If you don’t surround yourself with positive habit, negative habit will consume you instead. So you have to start watching yourself and seeing where your habits are taking you. Are they directing you towards success, or failure?
Depending on your answer you can see a vision of your future self. So be serious about your habits, then change your negative ones with positive routines.
Goal Setting: Setting and Achieving Your Goals
If you don’t have a clear vision of where you want to go, you will never reach any final destination. You will be lost forever.
Setting goals is different from having dreams and wishes. Dreams always lack specific directions. Setting goals is very important for your success. If you are not sure and committed to where exactly you want to go with your life, you will go nowhere.
Not all people set goals. People are usually scared and negative towards life. They don’t believe that they can achieve anything so they’re satisfied with what they have. Ambition is what separates the great from the normal.
You should know that your goals must be SMART. They have to be Specific statements such as “I want to build a six pack”. They also have to be measurable in order to be able to track your progress. They must be realistic and achievable. You can’t aim for something that is impossible.
Lastly, goals must also be bound by a time limit. If you want to build a six pack, you have to limit yourself to six months or a year for example. Goals can be short-term or long-term.
Sometimes when people focus on a certain goal they forget to live. It’s always good to have a balance between working and living. You have to take care of your family and your health. Staying focused is good, but living a life without joy is a bad decision.
An example of keeping your eyes on the prize is Florence Chadwick. She was a famous swimmer. She swam through the English Channel and now her goal was bigger.
Florence was determined to swim through the Catalina channel next. The whole world was watching as she fought against cold and fog one mile after the other. She even encountered some sharks along the way.
She was swimming and swimming but all she could see was the fog. Because Florence couldn’t see any land, she gave up. She was so close to achieving her goals but she gave up because she couldn’t see where the destination is.
Two months later, Florence tried again. She won this time and even beat the men’s world record by two hours.
This story teaches us the importance of having clear visions. If you can’t see your goals clearly, you will be discouraged and give up midway.
Values and Vision: Doing the Right Thing for the Right Reason
How do we know that our value system is the right one to have? How can we judge that we are doing the right thing? This is a tricky question because values are subjective. Everyone sees the world from his own perspective. So how can we decide?
There are two tests that you can use to check your values.
First, there is a test called the Mama test. If you’re doing something, ask yourself whether your mother will be proud to see you doing it or not. If she is, then you are on the right path, if she’s not not, then your values need to change.
The second test is called the Baba test. It works the same way except this time you’re the ones judging you. When you’re doing something, imagine your children in the room watching you. Will they be proud of their father? If yes, then keep going, if not, then you know what needs to be changed.
You can change your values with practice. Your values are important because they can determine who you are and what you get from life. If your values are wrong, your life will be miserable. Since values are at the core of your existence, you should start with them.
The right values will give you purpose to live. When you know your life’s purpose, your vision is clear. You know where you are going and what is it that you have to do to get there. A clear vision built from good values will set your life for the right path.
There was a story of a king called Midas. This king adored gold and the more he had, the more he wanted. He was storing gold everywhere.
One day, King Midas was visited by a stranger. This strange man told him that he can have one wish. Anything he asked will be granted.
Because the king loved gold, he asked the stranger to give him a golden touch. Midas wanted anything he touches to turn into gold. The stranger told him to wait till the next morning, and his wish shall be true.
When the king woke up the next day, he touched his bed and it turned into gold. He was so happy. He looked through the window and saw his daughter in the garden. That made him happier.
He tried to read but his book turned to gold. He tried to eat but his food turned to gold. He was upset and hungry. What made matters worse is his daughter. She came running to her father and once King Midas touched her she also turned to gold.
He started crying and crying. The strange man came back and asked him what he wanted this time. The king said sadly that he wanted the gold to disappear. All he cared about is his daughter and he can’t be happy without her.
The stranger gave him his wish. The king’s daughter was back and healthy. The king was now wiser; he now knows exactly what is important to him.
Just like this king, if we don’t check our values and priorities, we may be focusing on the wrong thing. We need to find what matter most to us then set a clear vision to achieve it.
Conclusion
This book is not about what you should you do to be a winner. It is about what you should BE to be a winner.
Success starts from our subconscious mind. It’s not the environment but it’s our personalities and values that determine our rate of success and failure.
In this book we learned the importance of having a positive attitude towards life. We also learned the importance of motivation and high self-esteems for building a successful life.
Do not forget, you can’t succeed on your own. You need to build good relationships with others. Your personality must be pleasing and inviting because life is like a boomerang. Whatever we do we will receive back.
We also learned how to set SMART goals that are specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and time-bound. These goals must be based on the right values.
You can’t live a life based on wrong values and negative habits. You have to stay focused on your vision, keep improving as an individual, and give back to the world.
Life is a win-win game. The more you care about other people and give back to society, the more you’ll receive.
So what are you waiting for? Follow the action plans provided by this book and start changing your life. Your own success is waiting for you, just start now.
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